A few days ago I was at a very large grocery store waiting in the checkout lane. A customer in front of me was complaining loudly to the poor checker that she had recently bought a box of cookies (at that store) and she did “not enjoy” the taste but the store would not give her a full refund.

The helpless checker smiled politely and said she was sorry the customer felt that way (great customer care response) but that the store couldn’t offer refunds on products just because someone didn’t like them - for whatever reason. The irate customer (IC) at that point started screaming and cursing out the checker. Even my ears were turning red from the selection of adjectives, verbs and nouns being yelled from the mouth of Ms. IC.

The IC made all the usual threats ranging from….I’ll tell all my friends never to shop here, I will call the Better Business Bureau, I will boycott your store forever (probably a good thing), I’ll do a charge back with my CC company, I’ll tell the world that the cookie company sucks….etc etc etc. She also threw in character attacks on the poor hapless checker just trying to do her minimum wage job.

Then at even a louder pitch Ms. IC screamed, I’m 55 years old and shop at every grocery store in town and they always let me buy all types of foods. If I don’t like the taste for whatever reason, they (all the other stores in town) give me my all of my money back.

By this time the entire checkout area was feeling bad for this poor defenseless checker and a manager rushed over escorting the very loud IC customer to a more private part of the store.

The IC was screaming so loud about how much she hated the store and the checker, the cookies…etc etc..that all of us customers in the checkout lane were talking amongst ourselves. No one was on the IC’s side.

A woman right behind me said “that type of behavior is what’s causing our economy to go to the dogs”. A man in the next line over agreed and said, to no one in particular, it’s spoiled rotten people like that customer that causes the price of cookies to go throw the roof. He laughed and said “how many people expect to be able to buy cookies, eat a few and then get all their money back because they didn’t like the taste”?

Exactly! I couldn’t have said it better myself.

Did the store manager relent and give the woman her money for the cookies? It didn’t appear so. Which is a good thing since she didn’t even have the half eaten box to show as proof she even bought cookies at that store.

What was Ms. IC buying in the check out lane? Six different types of cookies…..including Pepperidge Farm, Mrs. Fields, Oreos, Nabisco and some house brand. Maybe she has a cookie tasting scam where she goes in stores and causes a scene and then they comp all her new cookies?

At this point after 11 years in retail, nothing would surprise me. Absolutely nothing!.

The woman behind me, who turned out to be just lovely, agreed with the man and said, most consumers understand that they aren’t always going to like every type of food they buy. You don’t know what to buy until you try a few different brands. Does that mean each brand should give you a full refund because you don’t like the taste? Of course not.

Everyone also felt sorry for the poor checker who looked like she was going to cry after the nonstop IC verbal abuse.

Of course I had my say along with everyone else. I reported about my Internet customers who demand a full refund on hair and beauty products they try, but don’t like, even though the products are top of the line and not defective in any way. The lovely woman behind me said….that is just disgraceful. People need to act like responsible consumers and understand that stores aren’t in business for customers to try everything before they buy it.

Well put.

Customers who don’t get their way with shop keepers almost always say the same thing. They start with the…if you don’t do what I want I will……..never shop here again, tell all my friends, boycott, scream, cry….and they keep accelerating the tirade hoping they get their way.

Is there a Universal Book like a Dummies Guide For Being An Irate Customer? It seems like the threats and tirades are pretty much all from the same script. Who wrote those scripts? I definitely want to find that person.

Isn’t that what kids do when they’re having temper tantrums? Don’t they yell, scream and threaten? Of course kids also throw in the very dramatic leg kicking, feet stomping and arm waving which might not translate as well when displayed by full grown adults.

I just want to know why all retailers don’t have access to Irate Customer Police (ICP) who can show up and haul off the temper tantrum throwing ICs and permanently block them from future visits.

Even better, why don’t other customers grab the ICs and just throw them out of the store? This particular IC aka The Cookie Monster (pun intended) made the shopping experience stressful for all us other customers. She upset the checker and yes, she is the type of IC that causes the price of food and other consumables to continue to skyrocket.

Is that the only reason our economy is going to the dogs? Of course not. That would be much too simple an answer. But it certainly doesn’t help.

In the meantime remember that you can’t have your cookies and eat them too. Or is that you can’t have your cake? Regardless, you get my drift.

Tags: cookies, customers, economy, It's A Crazy World Out There

This entry was posted on Friday, June 20th, 2008 at 3:12 pm and is filed under Hair, Life In The CEO Lane. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.